Because He's In Love With Mom
by CarmenCleopatra
Summary: Nessie can't stop second guessing herself... and that means Jacob's in the firing line too. Angsty two-shot, possibly more if I feel inspired. R R please
1. Chapter 1

My life was perfect.

My parents were utterly in love, my family was more than well off, and I had aunts, uncles and grandparents who adored me.

And I had Jake.

But that's where my perfect life ended.

Wait, I'm making this sound much more dramatic than it actually is.

Jacob is… Amazing. Absolutely amazing. He's gorgeous, funny, kind and loved me. The love me was where the perfection stops.

Wait, I'm being overdramatic again.

I love my Jake with my entire being. When he's not there, I feel completely empty inside, and I want to spend all my time with him. I'm a bit like a drug addict, except the highs are better, the lows are worse, and Jacob isn't strictly a drug.

Well, not for most people anyway.

And I know Jake loves mom. With all his big stupid heart. And it makes me want to rip my own heart to shreds.

I've learnt to control my thoughts around my father, who would totally pep talk me if he even knew half of my thoughts. But I'm a sufferer of unrequited love, the most depressing thing on this entire crazy planet. And I'm suffering it alone.

My aunts all have my uncles, and my mom has my dad, and my grandparents have each other. It's utterly sickening, especially when I'm alone on my little island, wistfully watching Jacob laugh with my mom and talk to my dad and tease my Aunt Rose about her hair colour. And then he looks at me, and my heart stops. I smile a small smile at him, and he grins at me, but then I'm back to being alone.

Mom and dad are obviously keeping something from me about Jake, and I know it's gonna be something like "_we know you love him Nessie, but he just doesn't feel the same way.' _The overprotective vampires are keeping my heart safe.

To be honest, I wish they wouldn't.

I want to take the fall now. I can then run away from this, make money as a prostitute, and end up dead on a street somewhere in Las Vegas. No one would care.

Why am I being so dramatic?

Oh, I know.

Because all though all my family loves me, and I have some amazing friends at school, and I can get anything I want, and my life seems perfect, I am completely alone. I am in a one sided relationship that I can't seem to crawl out of. I mean, I try and look at other guys, honest to God, but they just don't seem to even compare, to Jake. I like my guys tall, with tanned skin and dark hair, who laugh lots and when they smile, the whole world smiles.

Think I've set my bar too high? So do I.

Damn my everlasting teen hormones. I know, tomorrow, or even later today, I will look at this piece of paper and laugh. Because there are moments when I just know Jacob loves me the way I love him.

But then my mom comes along, and the illusion shatters.


	2. Chapter 2

"Nessie, sweetie, can you take out the garbage for me?" I roll my eyes. Mom could super speed and the trash would be gone in the blink of an eye. I see dad glare at me, so I grab the bag and trudge out. My day has been boring, and I can't see it getting much worse…

"Hey Jake!"

Whoops, just did.

"Hey Bells, that for me?" I groan internally. Of course it's for you, stupid dog. Who else would it be for? We all drink blood…

I hear dad chuckle and I turn towards him. He winks and me and shoos me out, and I know they're gonna be talking about Jake's secret again. Sheesh dad, I know Jake's a wolf, no need to hide it from me.

I don't even bother listening into the conversation, cos I just know dad would warn mom and Jake, and they'd begin talking about the weather, like they did last time. I lug the trash out, taking my sweet time, and walk slowly back.

"How do I tell her? Cos I know our feelings aren't mutual…" Oh no. I should've taken longer with the trash. Run it to a dumpster in Canada or something. I hear dad cough, and they begin talking about school, but I know what I just heard was about me, and that means…

"Oh my God." He knows, he knows I like him. He knows I like him and he doesn't like me back. Oh no oh no oh no…

I hear dad yell my name, but I'm too busy. Too busy running from everything. Dad must have heard my thoughts from outside. I hear Jake yelling for me but I don't listen to him, I don't listen to any of the yells.

As I said, I can be overdramatic.

I continue to run for my life until I come across mom and dad's field and I just collapse into a heap, sobbing into the soft ground. I feel the letter to no one stuffed into my pocket fall to the ground. I curl up and just let the tears fall.

Being left alone with my thoughts is dangerous. All I can think is how I'm such a freaking pain for everyone, how I'm better off dead. I'm the bane of everyone's life. And no one's there to make these thoughts disappear.

"Nessie?" Oh great. Jake's here.

And dad's told him exactly what he heard me thinking before I ran for the hills.

I feel him approaching me, but he decides to stay a couple of feet from me. I guess my defences have really gone up this time.

"Who else?" I try to be witty, try to pretend I haven't been lying in the middle of this place for an hour and a half, alone with my thoughts, sobbing my heart out. Jake sits down on the grass and looks at me.

"I knew you'd be here, you know? Knew you'd come here." He looks at me and I feel myself blushing. Dammit, stupid human genes.

"Yeah, well I'm just _that _predictable, aren't I…" I look up at the sky, trying to stop myself from crying. You know, cos that always works. I feel Jake continue to look at me, and I hear him sigh.

"Your dad told me what you were thinking when you made your dramatic exit. Pretty deep stuff. Too deep to be honest Ness." I shake my head and laugh humourlessly.

"Yeah, well that's what you get when you become thirty too soon. You're too logical for your own good." Jake chuckles.

"Do you even know what your parents and I talk about when we're alone?" I roll my eyes, he's now trying to be deep. I can't really take him that seriously. He's Jake for Pete's sake. He's not ever supposed to be serious. He takes my eye roll as an invitation to continue,

"We talk about you and me, the way we look at each other." I can hear the next part in my head, "_cos I know you like me, and I'm really sorry Ness, but I don't like you like that…"_ I'll smile, say I'm fine, then find a way to kill myself. Cos that's the way I deal with things at the moment, obviously.

"I love you Ness, with all my heart." See, I told you…

Wait. Sorry. What?

"And until your dad told me that you felt the same way, I was so scared. Cos I don't think I'd be able to deal with the rejection."

"Woah woah woah… Back up one teeny tiny second." I look at him, "you _love _me? What? Jake where the _hell_ did this come from? I thought you were harbouring some kind of affection for my mother!" Jake looks at me in utter shock, then bursts out laughing. I glare at him until he pulls himself together.

"Ness, I have loved you, for ages now. That's what it means to imprint on someone. I am your soul mate." I smile to myself. So I'm not completely alone.

"I know what imprinting is Jake. I just didn't think we were," I gesture to him, then back to myself, "like that. We were always hanging out, drinking soda, watching action movies, driving motorcycles and eating fast food. What happened?" Jake looks as if he's deep in thought.

"Nothing, I don't think. We will continue to eat fast food, drink soda and watch action movies. We might even ride motorcycles. It's just, we can make out instead of watching the movie, act like soda and fast food are a date, and ride our motorcycles to a secluded spot…?" He winks at me, and I giggle. I suddenly realise how close he is, our faces are now centimetres apart, and I lean into him.

"I thought you liked mom," I sigh, "and that secluded spot sounds kinda nice. Especially after a motorcycle ride. Have I ever mentioned how sexy you are with wind-blown hair?" He grins at me and nuzzles my cheek, "and we can now hold hands in public, with it actually meaning something, right?" he nods, "and I can tell my girlfriends how amazingly fit my boyfriend is, and when you pick me up from school," I look at him, "which you _will, _I can say, 'that's my boyfriend, the gorgeous one with the wind-swept…" but suddenly he's kissing me, and I'm kissing back, and it feels like I'm walking on sunshine.

Sure I'm not usually one for clichés, but there's always a first time for everything.

"Your dad's gonna kill me." I smile, and I know I should care. I _really_ should care that my dad is going to murder my boyfriend (that word just rolls off the tongue). But I don't.

I also know that Jacob Black is mine. Forever and ever and ever.

Whoops, another cliché.

Look on the bright side. It's not about committing suicide.


End file.
